Whatever Happened to:

As long as we’re on Paulas…

~*~~*Click here to see Paula ABDUL ExPrEsS HeRseLf!!!*~*~*~

The bitch is crazy…can you hear the blood pressure in her laugh?

So, I always knew the Food Network’s southern belle was a little loopy.  But after a very brief and surprisingly easy looksy on youtube I realized that this woman has never had a single normal moment.  Her diet has turned her into the jolly white crazy cackling giant.  I’m SO scared.

 

Moment of Clarity:

 

Folks, if this man comes to your door asking for junk food or alcohol, please dont let him in.

Fuck that though, a serious moment of clarity:

ALSO, another video like the one above but different theme.  WATCH IT.

 

“Did You Know?” (Fantastic video on the progression of information technology, researched by Karl Fisch, Scott McLeod, and Jeff Bronman)

Moment of Clarity

 

Can we say Bratz doll?

Oh and WHATEVER HAPPENED TO:

If you’re feeling anything like me…

Lately I’ve been feeling a little more manic/anxious than usual.  Not being able to find a job is leaving me embarrassed to ask my father for money.  This whole math ordeal has left me in tears twice a week (I’m not kidding, every tuesday and thursday at 6, I cry a bit).  Also counting down to Coachella/worrying about whether I’m going to be able to make it has made me a wreck too.  But luckily I have been in this state in the past and have become incredibly adept at distracting myself/instilling a sense of schadenfreude in myself.  So if you’re feeling a little crazy, too crazy for your surroundings.  If you’re feeling fearful, fearful of your future.  If you’re feeling broke, too broke to live.  Then let me try and help you get through it, because I’m right there with you…we’re all losing it, it’s like Rent…or St. Elmo’s Fire.  We ARE GOING TO BE OK, just don’t kill yourself or get AIDS.

At least your not this girl:

EELSOUP

Or this girl:

OctapusGirl

If those two videos made you sick, or they didn’t help…then try going to Pandora.com and if you dont have an account MAKE one (it’s the best thing I’ve done since school started) and when you finish with your account.  Make an “Etta James” station, If this doesn’t calm you down…nothing will.

If none of this works, try looking at past Couture collections from John Galliano for Dior on Style.com.  Essentially when I feel crazy I do one of 3 things on the computer:

1. Look at beautiful things

2. Look at terrifying things that make me happy about my situation

3. Talk to people that make me happy. (For you that would be me, so IM me now)

and remember, everything is only for now.  I promise.

Moment of Clarity: RUMSPRINGA

Two of the main men in my life.  Changed me for the better.  Changed me forever.  HHC shout out and respect to those with their hands high and spirits higher.

Rumspringa (also Rumschpringe or Rumshpringa, derived from the Pennsylvania German term for “running around”) generally refers to a period of adolescence for some members of the Amish, a subsect of the Anabaptist Christian movement, that begins around the age of sixteen and ends when a youth chooses baptism within the Amish church or instead leaves the community.^[1] 

Happy Valen…..ugh.